A Thousand a Day
by Phoradendron
Summary: Inspired by Abbott and Costello's "A Dollar a Day". Haruhi has finally paid off her debt...or has she? please don't kill me if you don't like it- i know its not my best work, but still...*whimpers* Not as much KyoyaxHaruhi as I would've likd...


"Kyoya-Senpai," Haruhi approached Kyoya with an all-too-innocent-and-cute look as he sat in his chair figuring out how much Tamaki had spent on the last extravagant event.

"What, Haruhi?"

"I have finally paid off my debt."

His pen snapped. Haruhi quickly stepped back as the black ink spattered all over the floor….and his blue uniform. "Ah...ah…..um….."

"That will be another 8,000 yen added to your debt."

Haruhi smiled. Kyoya looked, no, _almost_ seemed nervous, but he was the Shadow King after all, and Shadow Kings don't lose their composure at a mere sentence.

"What are you smiling for, Haurhi?"

She smiled even wider. "I'm afraid you can't keep backing me into a bigger hole than I already have made. You see, I took precautions." She produced a blackboard from behind her back and drew some figures on it.

"You have said yourself, that one Host can make an average of 1,000 yen per day. Since the last three months, you have not added anymore to my debt of 240,000 yen except for today, so now my debt is 249,000 yen, which, may I add, may not be completely accurate since there could be more charges or other nonsense added so I waited a bit before coming to you with the good news."

"Ah, yes, since you are a bit clumsy after all. Continue." He leaned back and appeared to look relaxed, but was actually scheming madly for another way to keep Haruhi bound to the Host Club forever.

"I've been part of the Host Club for a year so far."

Twitch.

"If I take out eight weeks for summer vacation and three weeks for winter vacation, I will have worked for an average of 41 weeks, which is 287 days, which equals 287,000 yen. I just found out about this when I did these calculations last week and waited a bit to see if you would add any more to my stupid debt. I come now to inform you I won't be forced into anymore Host Club events."

Kyoya smiled. "Ah, but Haruhi, you must have known that there is always some invisible part that you are not aware of until the very last moment."

Haruhi smiled back, though it looked a bit forced this time. "No, I am sure my calculations are correct. I will be leaving, Kyoya-senpai." She started walking towards the door.

And was blocked by an arm.

"Not so fast. You've forgotten weekends." He whipped out his black notebook and quickly wrote down some more numbers. "41 weeks equals 2 weekend days, so 249 minus 82 days equals only 167 days, or 167,000 yen." Haruhi looked scared.

"B-but that just means I only have to work for a few more m-"

"Were you about to say 'a few more months'?" He adjusted his glasses so he could see his calculations better. "I'm sorry, but you are mistaken. I must also take away another 50,000 yen because of Tamaki's frivolous spending on holidays and other extravagant events where we lost money instead of earning more. Remember, you also participated in those events so I assume that you are also involved with the spending. You have earned only 117,000 so far."  
Haruhi gritted her teeth. "That stupid-"

"Hold on. I must also charge you for Tamaki, Hikaru, and perhaps even Kaoru."

"…what?"

"Haven't you noticed? Due to liking you, they have started to stop hosting as much because they feel that you are more important than other girls. That has also reduced club earnings. I shall charge you, let's say…."

_Please not too much, please not too much._

"Forty."

_Whew_

"…..thousand"

"WHAT?" Haruhi was furious. How is she to blame for a decrease in profits when it was Tamaki and Hikaru not hosting as well?

"20,000 for both Tamaki and Hikaru. Kaoru wasn't affected that much, so I will not include him. That means you have earned only 77,000 yen so far, not even enough to have covered the vase you broke on the first day you entered this room."

"Hold on. Has Tamaki and Hikaru really slacked off that much? They don't seem to have changed_ that_ much …"

Kyoya frowned. "Not only that, but they've also started to try and impress you by spending more than necessary from club profits on only you. Do you want me to list all of them?" He flipped open his notebook again. "Friday, December 18th: Tamaki bought Haruhi a-"

"Er, never mind. I'm just angry that I've worked a whole year and only made 80,000 yen so far. How am I ever going to pay for that coming extra family member…." She trailed off, looking deep in thought.

Wait, what? Kyoya pushed his glasses up again. "Extra mouth to feed?"

She glanced at him sadly. "Oh yes, it was actually all my fault. I wandered away from Dad for just a few minutes when this one guy who was following me around for a while tripped me and I fell into an alley and-"

He coughed loudly. "I don't want to hear the rest of it." He thought for a moment, then started exploding. "HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN, HARUHI? I THOUGHT YOU WERE MORE RESPONSIBLE THAN THAT! WHERE WAS RANKA?"

She thought a little, tilting her head in a cute way while Kyoya was fuming in his chair, gripping the armrests of the chair so hard his knuckles turned white. "I think he was looking at some spinach on sale."

"…I am going to have a very, very long conversation with him next time he talks with me." He whipped out his cell phone.

"I know, right? I'm really ashamed of myself too. This isn't the right time or conditions, and how am I supposed to take care of it? I'll never be able to work off my debt!" Haruhi's eyes started watering and she ducked down her head. Kyoya actually felt sad himself as he watched her try to hold in the tears.

"Er, I suppose I could be a little more lenient about your, um, debt. Since you have been working for a year already, I will add an extra 100,000 to the amount you have earned, making it 177,000, also because Tamaki did not spend, um, _quite_ as much as I thought he had, now that I have seen my calculations again…"

"That means I only have to work for another month, right? Oh, thank you so much! You've solved all my problems!" She started to leave again but Kyoya caught her arm.

"Hold on, when is it coming? Now that you've told me, we can help you with it."

"Oh, it's not that big of a deal anymore. I think it will be arriving in the next three weeks or so…huh?" Thud. Kyoya, the great Shadow King, had fallen down.

"Welcome, one and all, to the-" Tamaki was cut short as Kyoya rushed over and grabbed him by the front of the shirt. "Tamaki!" he hissed. "Haruhi has something _very_ important to tell you! She's-"

"Oh yes! I forget to tell you about the new family member! I'm sure you'll love her, since you like Antoinette so well after all."_ What does this have to do with…?_

"Really? When can I meet her?"

"I think Ranka's going to pick up his new puppy in the next few weeks at most, since the shop owner said it was still too young to leave its mother."  
Kyoya's eyes widened as he continued watching the conversation between Tamaki and Haruhi. "Wait, Haruhi, how is getting a new PET DOG a big problem for you?"

She looked sad again. "Just think of how much a puppy eats! And I'll have to train it, and clean it, and walk it, and take care of it while it grows up! I knew I shouldn't have lost track of Dad when he entered the pet shop! It's all my fault! How am I supposed to focus on school now? I DON'T HAVE TIME TO TAKE CARE OF IT!"

Silence.

She glanced at both Tamaki and Kyoya. One looked a little worried for Haruhi while the other seemed like he was about to explode.

"What's wrong, Kyoya-sempai?"

"…Never mind. I shall have another talk with you later about, ahem, _misleading_ Hosts."

Haruhi was very confused.


End file.
